In the spirit of the new year, here’s a reminder of where my kids are today, right now.  All five of these kids are amazing.  Some days amazing in ways that make my heart skip a beat and other moments where I might not want to claim them.  I expect great things from these kids this year.  I am full of hope and love for each one of them and while my heart breaks just a bit at the thought of them getting older, I am also anxious to see more about just who they are.

Reflecting on where they are right now honestly makes me want to wake each one of them up right this second and tell them just how much I love them.

Sunshine~ (I know, I know, your birthday letter; almost done, I promise.)  My beautiful baby girl, you are too much (Chelsea’s words and so spot on) most days.  You wake up calling out “MOM”, and go to sleep calling out for me  Kind of sweet.  And sometimes your dad sneaks you into my room!  But how can we turn you away?  The reality is we can’t.  You are just that precious to us.

You play, really play.  You make your babies kiss me, you bring me food to share and you want to hang with the boys.  Your vocabulary grows every single day.  How is that?  I love how you deliberately speak: an example, “cheese” long pause “stick”.  And you are ALL GIRL.  I couldn’t be happier either.  Sure you can hang with your brothers, but I don’t think I have to worry about having a tomboy.  And no offense to tomboys, but after four boys, daddy wants a girlie girl.

The cutest thing you do right now?  You see something and show me.  Over and over.  You call, “MOM” and point it out to me.  Like any kid, you must have recognition from me immediately.

Your kisses???  You actually pucker up your lips.  I can’t get enough and quite frankly, neither can anyone else in the family.

Snax~ oh my boy, where to start.  When they say all kids are different, I have to smile. Truer words were never spoken.  You are your own person.  Tough, too cynical for your age, street smart and just a mess.  And a total momma’s boy.  As tough as you are, you still tell me you love me all the time.  It’s the sweetest thing, you’ll be doing your own thing, then innocently look at me and say, “I love you, mom”.  I will never stop wanting to hear those words from you.

Thus far, you’ve broken 4 Christmas gifts.  That I know of.  You’re just kind of rough.  But at the same time, you’re sweet.  You love your sister so much and watch after her in your own way.  You are obsessed with angels and the devil.  On a daily basis you ask me how we can kill the devil.  My response is love.  You are just not satisfied with that answer.  At all.  You continue to ask if sharks, alligators, ninjas and guns can hurt the devil.  You are no fan of King Herod and can’t stand King Wencesles’s brother, both good things.

The big news right now is you have decided you want to read.  This week.  So each day this week, we’ve sat on the couch reading simple stories.  I love hearing you sound words out.  It’s my favorite sound these days.

You ride like a demon on your scooter, and Dad is positive you’ll be great on the skateboard in no time at all.  You love your capes.  Recently, I found you stripped to your underwear wearing your red cape.  Although at times, you have a cranky face and sometimes the cynicism of a weary old man, your joy shines through more often.  That is what I want you to keep, that pure joy of being a child that is loved.

The other day I asked you where we lived.  Your response: “not France”.  This clearly describes just who you are better than I ever could.

Baby Hulk~ You are the one that gets it…seasons that is.  And I love that about you.  You are offended that once again, another holiday is being forced upon us.  This time, you saw Easter candy.  And despite the fact that the offensive candy was one of your favorite candies, you just couldn’t understand why Easter candy was out already.  Kid, the liturgical calendar was made for you.  Okay, maybe not just you, but you have no idea how proud I am that you understand that there really is a season for everything.  Now if only I could manage to bring you four seasons…

The other day you told me that your teeth hurt.  I asked which ones, the bottom middle.  They are loose!!!  The first teeth that grew in when you were a tiny baby are loose.  Your beautiful face is about to change.  Ready or not, it is happening.

You love to talk on the phone.  You search through my phone and make calls all the time.  And you get slightly annoyed when certain people don’t answer the phone.

I love reading to you.  I hope I always remember the look on your face as I’m reading a story to you.  Not picture books, those you have to sit next to me, it’s the real chapter books that I like reading to you.  Whereas your brother would read along with me, you like to sit and be an active listener.  You take the entire story in and make it your own.

Do you know how proud I am that you love our priest and can regularly tell me part of the homily?  You actually listen.  You are such a sweet little boy, you feel more than others and I love that about you.

Goose~ Today you told me you knew what you wanted to be when you grew up.   I was curious since you decided doctor was it years ago much to Paul’s dismay.  Doctor no more, you’re onto even loftier goals: football or basketball player.  Or artist or poet.

You love sports so much, and you can’t watch a game without having some stake in it. So each game you ask who I’m cheering for and you go crazy when “your” team wins.  You were in such a state wondering who you should cheer for when OU played the Aggies.  You couldn’t just watch the damn game.  I love that you stay up late to watch games and that you discuss plays with your dad.  You say you want to play, but I think coaching may be in your blood.

I watch you with numbers and am amazed by how much you get it.  I am embarrassed to admit I had to have you explain something to me today.  I’ll blame it on the “new” math you’re learning.  I do wish you paid a bit more attention in class.  It would make me a lot less stressed.  And here’s why, you have the ability to do so much.  You just need to actually read what’s in front of you.

Last week, we read a book together.  Like we used to do: one chapter you read, one chapter I read…I loved it and vow to spend more time reading with you and not just to you.  I enjoy discussing books with you and like when you make me sit and read a passage with you.  I got pretty lucky the day you started reading!

You are literally growing up so fast.  It makes my heart stop.  Yet in some ways, you are still that little boy who loves Big Snoopy and wants to sneak into my room to sleep.  I could hold onto that forever.

Squirt~ Today, you handed me a brochure.  I started flipping through it.  It’s for graduation announcements.  Really.  Really????  When and how did this happen?

It’s true.  You’re a senior, and soon, you will be moving to something new.  I honestly don’t know when this happened.  You continue to amaze everyone who sees you.  People can’t believe just how handsome you’ve become.  Nor can they believe that you want to become a Marine.

Yes, the Marines.  That’s your goal.  I’m proud and scared at the same time.  I think it’s a great thing, hopefully, you’ll gain discipline and work ethic, but as a mom it kills me to think of you in dangerous places, of anyone (other than me) shouting instructions at you.  If this is the path you choose, I’ll trust that it will work out.  It’s hard parenting older children, at some point, you finally come to the realization that it’s not your life, that you don’t get to make all the choices anymore.  I know this dream isn’t really flighty because you’ve wanted to be in the military for years.

I would be remiss if I left out the girls…you have always wanted a girlfriend.  You feel a bit more than I would like at this age, but that’s who you are.  Today, you told me a girl asked you out.  And all I could think of was that I didn’t like her.  I have to say I am so not ready for you to get really serious with a girl.  Mainly, I just want you to maintain dignity, both in how you allow girls to treat you and how you treat them.

You love your little sister so very much, and you get slightly annoyed when she doesn’t give you attention.  The boys look up to you so much.  I hope you always give them reason to look to you for help.  We’re almost at the end of this season.  I think we’re ready.