Sure, I know it’s past the Christmas season, but I started this post way back when I thought I might find the time to finish a post.

So just a word or two on Santa and that effing elf.

First, yes, I believed in Santa, and so do my kids.  That said, almost every single gift comes from me.  Okay, me and Lance.  But really it’s me, the kids know who does the shopping and not because I let it slip.  They just know those things.  Santa brings two gifts per child, sometimes one big gift.  That’s it.  Some fat man in a red suit is not stealing my thunder after all my hard work picking out presents.

I’m fine with the whole Santa thing, I mean it doesn’t bother me to lie to my kids about him.  That said, I don’t think it takes away from the magic of Christmas not to do Santa.  I say “do” because there is definitely a group out there that definitely doesn’t talk about Santa at all.  The ones I know are uber Catholics.  It’s the whole Saint Nicholas thing…he was in fact real so why focus on some legend when you can talk about the real saint?  I get that and actually kind of like that.  I would love to have stockings on St. Nicholas day, but Lance likes Santa.  Because I could care less about him, he is always worried I’ll give him away.  I won’t, but let me say, when Goose told me he didn’t believe this year, I was happy!  And you know what?  Christmas for him was still special and magical.  Even without Santa.

I will say, I never use Santa as a threat for gifts.  I don’t like that.  We never earn gifts, especially during Christmas, I mean, come on, isn’t Christmas about the birth of the Savior?!!  So for me, the threat of telling Santa if you’re bad just kind of drives me crazy.  Probably not kind of.

So Santa is fine as long as not a “be good” mechanism.  The elf?  Get the fuck out of here.  I won’t even pretend and if you are around me, I won’t pretend for your kids so don’t bring him up around me.  I mean, all but three of my friends have an elf, and the others don’t let me around their kids during December, so clearly, I’m in the minority on this damn thing.  I guess it’s the entire stress of Christmas for me, but I don’t want one more thing.  I love traditions and maybe that elf is a great tradition for others, but honestly, we’ve got some pretty good traditions going in our family, something that is important to both me and Lance, so I don’t need an elf.  Ever.  And again, I think my kids are okay.  But to those who do, great for you and your creativity on moving him to new spots each day.  Creativity is not my strong suit at all, so maybe that’s why I don’t do it.

Then there is the Catholic take…”no, we will not move an elf daily, that’s not what Christmas is about…we will move our wise men every day until epiphany.”  Just as bad as far as I’m concerned.  I mean, really, any house that refuses to use an elf on religious reasons clearly knows about the reason for the season.  Do we have to move wise men????

So there it is…my take on Santa!