So…I’m having a baby in about twelve hours. And I’m still up. I actually waited to eat until now so I’m not starving all morning. We’ll see if this plan works for me. If not, I will daydream about Miller’s Cafe for dinner tomorrow during the section. Thank God I have a doctor who allows me to eat the same day of surgery.

I’ve been manic all day long. I guess a bit nervous about tomorrow. It’s not like we haven’t done this before now. And really, c-sections are nothing for me. I know anything could happen, but I’m counting on another smooth recovery. Do I really have any other choice? It’s the week before Christmas, and I have four other kids who need me home.

I’ve been thinking about leaving four and moving onto five. Lance came home from the station today freaking out. Are we really prepared for five kids? It seems like we have a full plate now, how will this one affect our family harmony or lack thereof at times? Will our children remain happy with another one in the house? It’s not like we can do anything now, but I understand his stress. We just show it in different ways. He wants to spend time together, I want to clean the entire house that I just cleaned on Saturday. (Although really, it is almost time to clean again.)

I can’t really answer if we’re ready. But I can answer that this child will come into a house full of love. Two parents who truly love each other and their kids with their entire being. I trust that God gave me the best man to share in this awesome responsibility. I trust that while we make mistakes, we learn from them and do better each day. I am glad that Lance isn’t content with the way things are for our family. He constantly wants us to strive to be better. With God’s grace, I know we can be the best parents for our kids, including number five. I am so thankful for this pregnancy and the excitement of tomorrow. I have loved being pregnant and feeling this little child grow inside me. It’s a feeling I never want to forget, yet I know I will because things just get better once she arrives. I can’t wait to see the Baby Hulk tomorrow. Both he and Squirt are so excited about this baby. Both sets of grandparents will be here tomorrow, a first for us! And we have two special girls making an appearance tomorrow. This baby is already so blessed with the abundance of love surrounding her.

We’ll post pictures tomorrow, assuming I can figure out how to use my NEW MAC LAPTOP. Thanks Daddy! (Oh God…is this how my daughter is going to be???) Prayers welcome.