I haven’t mentioned it (because I never write here anymore) but my amazing husband has been working for the NFL on the side.  Anyone who knows him says it’s about time.  And it is.  He was made for this.  He was hired to write draft analysis for their website.  Every player going into the draft.  Every one.  He went to the Combine and was on their online show and did an amazing job.  Compliments all around from loyal listeners who know just how smart he is to his bosses to new fans.  It’s been a long journey to get here.  It’s overdue, really.  Really overdue.

Lance has always been into the draft.  Always gone to the Senior Bowl and written about players entering the draft.  He’s been invited to participate in mock drafts with the best of them.  So this job was made for him.  It was so cool to hit NFL.com and see his name under each player analysis.

The only downside is that it’s a lot of work.  We are spoiled  We’re used to spending a lot of time together.  This “side job” has him renting office space and working until 7pm most nights and weekends.  He missed most of the boys’ basketball games this season.  Has been out of town several times with another trip on the horizon.  It’s been tough.  But so worth it.  I hope it opens more doors for him because he deserves it.  He works hard and has such a passion for this.  I am so proud of him!!!

I’m always working on yelling less.  I guess really the virtue of patience.  And I have five kids with which to practice.  Man, it’s rough sometimes.  We don’t spank, but that isn’t anything to brag about because we yell.  A lot.  Too much.  Recently, at story time someone told me that they yelled too much and they were taking some challenge to stop.  I couldn’t believe this lady yelled at her precious little kids.  But she described some scenes, and wow, they sounded just like me.

I vowed to make a real effort, with prayer and support. So far, it’s working.  I mean, I’m only two weeks in, but yelling has decreased a lot.  I’ve journaled in my own private diary~God, how I love to write my private thoughts down.  When I die, I pray to God Sarah and Stacy are still around to destroy all written evidence of my inner thoughts.  These diaries go back…way back.  But I digress…SO, I’ve been writing about triggers and what’s worked and what hasn’t and what I need to work on with the kids.  It has resulted in leaving Marianna alone while she had a total meltdown that included throwing her babies against the wall and having a grownup talk with Drake about something I was really pissed about.  All without yelling or being a mean bitch.

I’ve found someone to hold me accountable and that is helping a lot.  Then last night I was listening  to a podcast, and the speaker said she forced herself to think of three things she was grateful for in the moment when she gets stressed.  Wow.  Seriously, if I could train myself to do that…Game changer.

I’ve also stopped sending Lance text messages when his kids are acting unruly.  Usually the text messages are pretty viscous and only stress him out while he’s trying to work.  Nothing was working with those messages except he would get mad at me.  Me!  The only reasonable one.  Right?  Anyway, he noticed and asked if the kids were behaving better.  I told him nope, I just didn’t want to stress him out.  I had to be honest.  He thanked me for the honestly and leaving him out of the mess.

Speaking of kids, am I the only parent who worries about their future?  Not in a “the world sucks” kind of way, but in a “are they going to be good, moral people” way.  I worry about this all the time.  I see a lot of traits that really worry me.  One of them being dishonestly.  They lie over shit constantly.  I literally have two kids I don’t trust at all.  Seriously, not one word that comes out of their mouth.  So what am I supposed to do?  These are things that keep me up at night.  Where did I go wrong?  How am I failing?  I don’t lie to them.  So why do they lie.  And honestly, they aren’t even good at it.

I went to an amazing talk last week with a mom who I follow online.  I rarely read blogs anymore, but I love this lady and still follow her.  She has six kids, five boys and one girl.  She’s Catholic and I just know she and I would be great friends if she lived in Houston.  Except maybe she doesn’t cuss as much as me.  She is so real~ when it’s good and when it’s hard.  Her talk was on friendship, but I went in and introduced myself and asked how she had gotten to the place she was right now~ completely enjoying her crew.  She assured me that it’s not all roses and gave some helpful hints.  One of them being to find a mentor that I could turn to in times of stress.  She said it has helped her so much to call on an older mom that has been through it all.  I loved that idea and when I was telling a mom from story time about the talk she asked if I could be her older mom.  Because I’m the old mom at story time.  I’m not sure anyone would ever need me as a mentor! The actual topic of her talk was friendship.  And it was good.  It made me appreciate the friends I have and realize the importance of  having friends that bring you up instead of down.   I pray for my friends all the time, and I pray that I’m a good friend to them.

Marianna and I go to daily mass every Thursday and Friday.  We try for other days, but we always hit those two.  Mari loves Monsignor Rossi.  So do I.  He gives great sermons, and he loves my little girl.  He presides over mass those two days.  Except if something comes up.  When something does come up, I sigh a little and Marianna sighs a lot.  Last week was one of those days.  But was I blessed.  The other priest who I like okay, but not a ton, said that each morning he prays for the goodness he needs for the day.  A simple little prayer, but a powerful one.  I’ve always heard God gives us the grace we need if only we ask for it or accept it.  I feel like this prayer has been a lifesaver for me.  So while Mari was upset that day, I feel like it was meant to be.

And lastly, I have to say I have made some amazing friends via Lance’s show.  I have three friends I am extremely close to and can’t imagine not having them in my life.  I rely on these people like I’ve known them all my life.  I have other people I know from his show that I’m not as close to yet, but feel lucky to have met them.  Who would have ever thought that I would find friends from his show!?!

Happy weekend!  I’m off to bed by ten so I can run 12 tomorrow!